Control ;of Destiny

I believe there is a power greater than ourselves and our fate is somewhat of our own making, but not entirely. We have the power to make decisions, to determine what is right and wrong but our final path is predetermined. We think we cannot find the strength to do what needs to be done and yet we manage to get through the hardest of times.
Tomorrow Pete will be home, at least for a short while and I will be able to do what I need to do to help him.

Things are Only Things

I entered my home today and realized how empty it was. Oh, the furniture is still there and all my "chachkees" are in place. Nothing has been removed but so much has changed. The computer room is dark and no one is in there watching t.v. with the volume turned up. There is no one at the computer or playing on an I Touch. There are no cups on the table waiting for me to put in the dishwasher. Peter is not here and will probably never be here again. CRAP

Ah, Those Memories

I haven't written in several days. Not that I haven't thought of writing but somehow time got away from me as I prepared for the Passover holiday. I had invited nine for the first night sedar and 16 for the second. So, for three weeks I was busy cooking and baking. My friends thought I was completely out of my mind but they were happy to accept the invitation. I can't say it wasn't hard work but it got my mind off a lot of sadness and as I cooked I remembered so many happy times shared with family and friends.
I remembered following closely and unnoticed behind my grandmother while she put the finishing touches on the holiday table. As she carefully placed a cherry in the middle of each grapefruit I quietly picked it up and ate it. I could see the look on her face as she turned to view the set table only to find the cherries had disappeared.
I remembered the holiday when my mother's matzo-balls turned out to be matzo mush and the time when our dog ran around the house in utter panic after grabbing the horseradish root off the table and eating it. I picture my brother sleeping and snoring on the living room couch after the passover meal.
So many good times, so much to remember. I am lucky to have these memories and rely on them to give me strength and comfort.

When Does The Melting Pot Gel?

Yesterday I was introduced to a friend of a friend and somewhere in the conversation she asked me, "What are you?" So I answered,"I'm the proud mother of three children and three grandsons and happy to be the significant other of a very nice man." "That's not what I meant. What is your ethnic background?" "Oh,you want to know where I come from. I come from Brooklyn. I'm an American."
Many people identify themselves by the country(s)of their ancestors. What I want to know is, how many generations will it take for people people born in the United States to proudly say, "I am an American?"

Look Both Ways When Crossing The Street

As many of you know pedestrians have the right of way in Florida. We can all feel safe walking across the street or going into a store from a parking lot. Today I realized this is not so and Floridians have been given a false sense of security.
As I exited T.J. Max and proceeded to enter the cross walk I saw a car and it seemed to be slowing up to stop for me. I continued to walk and just as I was across a breeze hit me . I quickly turned to see that the car did not stop and almost hit me. Now, the car was going very slow so I called to the driver to stop. The driver stopped rolled down the window, I'd say she was in her mid 80's. I said, " You're supposed to stop for pedestrians." "Oh, yes, dear", she replied "I didn't see the stop sign and thank you for pointing it out to me." I didn't know if she meant the actual stop sign at the end of the road or the tush she almost ran in to.

Drawback to retirement

Well. I just missed the garbage men again. When I retired Pete told me that everyday would be Saturday. And you know, he was right. So why don't they come for the garbage on Saturday. DAH

You Can Only Do Your Best

How many times have you heard "It's o.k. you did your best." What happens when your best isn't good enough? No matter how hard you try you can't win the game, you can't make the grade, you continue to fail. Perhaps it is not you who are failing. Maybe the expectations of others is unrealistic and unfair.

You're O.k. It's Not You It's Them

Every day we are bombarded with commercials telling us what to eat, how to dress and what we should look like at any given age. I especially like the ones targeted at the "older woman". You know, women with those little crows feet, smile and brow lines and oh, the dreaded sagging neck. I see the before and after pictures and I'm shocked at the thought that these women could go outside and show their faces without the help of
Dr. So and So or the worlds best rejuvenating cream.
What is beauty anyway? Isn't it only what our society says it is. Look at how the definition of beauty has changed. Once a little meat on the bones was considered attractive and desirable. Now thin is in. Having more years behind me than in front of me I don't feel it's necessary to deny myself a sweet or dessert because I won't fit into the bikini. There are plenty of nice one piece suits.
What I'm trying to get at is:
It's o.k. to look your age. Be proud of what you are. Stop buying into the cosmetic industries picture of a woman.

Miss Manners Where Have You Gone?

Today, as I was out shopping, I spied a man picking his nose. I wanted to go over and ask him to pick me a winner, but I held myself back. A little while later I was stopped at a light and the man to my left spit out his window. I was happy my window was closed because I know I would have been hit. UGH! Gross! Then to top off the day a woman almost knocks me over and just keeps on walking as if nothing had happened.

What has happened to manners and common decency? Perhaps like the alligator and the bald eagle people who display manners and courtesy should be placed on the endangered species list and protected by law.

Coping

I have always believed that no matter what is happening around us and to us it is important to be strong and keep a positive attitude. Sometimes though it is so very difficult, and yet without strength and hope there is no future.

Nothing Changes

My daughter told me that my grandson was being teased about being the shortest kid in his kindergarten class. I can certainly relate to this because I too was always the shortest kid in my class and I do believe that my children were always first on line as well.
Years ago my husband and a friend were discussing prejudice. Our friend related how he was teased because he is a Japanese America. He went on to talk about racial and religious prejudice in this country . When my husband finally got a chance to talk he said," Look at you, you are tall ,good looking and have a full head of hair. I'm short,skinny, average looking, and bald. No one picked me for the team and I didn't get a date until I was almost finished with high school."

It doesn't matter what color you are, what religion you practice, or what you look like, sadly there will always be someone who wants to make themselves feel important by making you feel rotten.

So I told my grandson to tell the bullies and teasers:
I might be short but I am very smart and will probably be very rich one day.

Tick Tock Goes The Clock

When we are young time seems to go by ever so slowly. We wait impatiently for the time when we can do the "grown-up" stuff. Then we are grown-up and we're too busy trying to make a living and bring up a family to notice that time has gone by ever too quickly. Before you know it you're looking back and reminiscing.
Ah, what you would do to get some of that time back.

Be There Now

Think about how many people you feel close to, relatives, friends, co-workers. Now think if they were suddenly taken out of your life would you grieve? Would you feel profound sorrow? If you said yes to the last two questions I would like you to ask yourself, when was the last time you spoke to this person to ask how they were doing?
When was the last time you shared a moment of their life?

Do not come to cry at my funeral if you had no time to laugh with me during my life.

Miracles are Everywhere

It seems when things are not going so good we ask some higher power for a miracle as if miracles are a rare thing and only happen at particular times. Scientists will explain the awesome power of the sun but can they explain how the sun got there? They can only give us theories and even scientific theories conflict.
How can you explain the profound feeling of joy and comfort when someone dear holds you close? Why do blooming flowers make us happy? Why do we experience a euphoric feeling when we become a parent or grandparent? What path of fate led us to find love even when we thought there was no hope?

Each day think of the miracle of just being alive. Embrace your loved ones and pray that they will be safe and with you tomorrow.

Not a Pretty Picture

Today as I entered the supermarket a young man was exiting, shorts crotch down near his knees, underwear a bit above the waist of his pants and the crack of his behind out there for everyone to see. This is not the first time I've seen this kind of attire but I just couldn't keep quiet. I walked up to the young man and asked why he thought his behind was so beautiful that it was necessary to show it off. He was stunned and didn't know what to say. I continued to tell him that it was offensive to most people and although he thought he was in style I needed to call the fashion police. He actually replied by saying how sorry he was and that he was only following a trend.
Now I thought to myself what if all the senior men in Florida decided to follow the same trend.

Close your eyes and visualize the picture!

What You Say Makes a Lasting Imression

I was brought up in a family where it was easier to criticize than to praise. I remember getting all dressed up to go to my aunt's house and feeling like the most beautiful child in the world only to be told, "Oh, there's a loose button on your dress. Mommy must have missed this when she got you dressed." I remember the family talking about each others faults and frailties rarely speaking about accomplishments.

I was the "wild child" of the family. I was the one who didn't follow the rules, who asked "Why?" who was inquisitive and not afraid to take chances.
When I eloped at 19 and became a single parent at 20 you can just imagine the burning telephone conversations between my relatives. However, did one of them congratulate or send me or send a card when I managed to get myself through college? When I was taking care of my dieing husband I can't remember any of them holding me and giving me words of encouragement. Still, when I see them they rehash the times I met with their disapproval. It seems they can't feel comfortable saying something complimentary, how sad.

So I say: try hard to close your lips when you want to say something that might hurt someone. Think of a different way to say what you think it is so necessary to say.
Tell people how proud you are to be part of their life. Make constructive suggestions rather that critical remarks.

Friends, Freindship and the People Around Us

Unless you're a hermit or an agoraphobic you will be in the company of many people during the day, some you will call your friends, some coworkers some casual acquaintances others will just have the status of passers by but each person will have been a part of your life that day. Noone is alone unless they chose to be. Friends are important to have but what does the word friend really mean?
Is a friend the person you call when you're in trouble? yes
Is a freind the person you can always count on to be there for support? yes
Will a friend make you smile, laugh, and feel better? yes
But a friend is a person and we know that no person is perfect. So I say:

You cannot call a person your friend unless you are willing to accept and love them warts and all.

Aging is a Global Experience

We are surrounded and bombarded with information telling us how to look younger, how to remove wrinkles, how to have shiny sexy hair and radiant skin. Our world is too worried about how we look. Isn't it more important to find ways to improve the quality of life by learning how to accept ourselves and others and realize that no bottle of magic cream can replace a hug or a loving smile.

Aging for women is a global experience:
At the age of about 40 our breasts start moving south
At the age of 50 our gums have started to move north
By age 60 our hips have moved east and west

See what I mean

First Thoughts and Wise Advice

I have been toying with creating a blog for some time. So finally, I decided now is as good a time as ever. My problem was I had no idea what to do. Fortunatly for me Peter, the man in my life is a whiz at this so here I am.

Having lived for some 6 decades and then some I realize that I have a pretty good grip on what's going on. I don't believe I'm smarter than anyone but the years have given me some insight and wisdom. So each day or so I'm going to write about something I have noticed or something that boggles my mind

First Thought: Right when you think you have the bull by the horns you realize the bull actually has his horns up your tush.